The Horror!

My husband and I are leaving tomorrow to head back east for the holidays. I’m thrilled.

Okay, not really.

For one, and for a lack of a better term, it is going to be FREEZING BALLS. This, in itself, is annoying. However, I was even more annoyed when I realized – during packing – that my fabulous pea coat no longer fits. Of course I came to this conclusion while I was, literally, shoving Christmas fudge into my mouth. Go figure. So now, I am at the point where I have to make a decision in the next few hours as to whether I am going to need to purchase a giant parka.

I am torn.

On one hand, I don’t want to be wandering around Western Pennsylvania with frost-bite. On the other hand, in the southwest we really have no need whatsoever for parkas. So aside from this next week, it would really be a waste of money. Unless hell freezes over, and then it just helps to be prepared. But see, if I DO buy a parka, I really don’t want to buy a plus-sized one. Because hopefully, the next time I have to wear it (if ever), I will be thinner. Then again, parkas are always really huge anyway. I don’t know.

Can you sympathize with my frustration?

Of course not. Because I sound like a whiney little b*atch who can’t put down the treats long enough to fit in a jog. I don’t blame you. It’s easy to lose weight. It really is. The hard part, is the discipline to do it. When I am doing everything right, I get results. And quickly. I am blessed in that respect.

So then why do I sit here, complaining, but refusing to take action? I have no flippin’ clue.

Hopefully over the next few weeks I can figure out just what the heck my problem is, and find my motivation again. I have never been a fan of New Year’s resolutions, but I am thinking that it might encourage me to make some changes.

We’ll see.

In the meantime, I wish you all a very Merry Christmas!




P.S. I really do want world peace.

So mad at myself!

I have royally effed myself.





Now, before you jump to conclusions, I will have you know that these were not for me. Not all of them at least.

Here’s the scoop: our public relations firm was recently hired to coordinate the media outreach for the opening of a brand new Krispy Kreme store here in town. So for weeks, we have had doughnuts around the office. I originally did not plan on having a single one, but if you’ve ever had a Krispy Kreme doughnut, I don’t have to tell you that my plan went to hell. A very generous Krispy Kreme owner who insisted on sending PR practitioners home with boxes of goodies every day, didn’t help.

Neither did my lack of planning. With a lack of time lately, I have not had time to go grocery shopping, or cook. Nor do I have room to store healthy food currently since I have not yet tossed the Thanksgiving leftovers (gross – I know). And if I don’t have time to shop, it pretty much goes without saying that I haven’t had time to exercise later. So, this weekend all we had around the house in terms of food was, literally, frozen pizza and Krispy Kreme doughnuts. Naturally, I consumed an astonishing amount of doughnuts – most filled with cream.

Well, after weeks of planning and media events, yesterday was finally the big grand opening. Thank God. But, this was not before I had to load my car up with 100 dozen original glazed doughnuts and venture through a blizzard at 3:30 a.m. delivering these coronary blockages to media outlets throughout town. During this process the conditions became so bad that I had to return to the office rather than Krispy Kreme until it was safe to head back out. Since I hadn’t eaten anything it was hard not to have doughnuts for breakfast. And since I had no idea how long I was going to be trapped in the storm, I thought I’d just go ahead and start preparing for hibernation if it became absolutely necessary.

Today, I am at the point where if I see another doughnut, I am going to throw-up. I now need to do a massive detoxification of some sort (if you have any suggestions) and get back on the bandwagon. Of course, the other challenge facing me this week is finals. And nothing calls for carb-loading more than cramming for tests. So I am trying to resist that temptation.

I don’t plan to weigh myself for quite a while, though I suck at that and always do it anyway. I do feel, however, that this little situation has really encouraged me to stay focused through the rest of the holidays. I officially feel like crap, physically and emotionally, and am reminded as to why I started this whole process in the first place.

And that is the story of this week’s Krispy Kreme debacle.




P.S. I really do want world peace.

Thanksgiving Leftovers

I have been a very, very bad girl.

Thanksgiving was interesting. My family came in to visit, which was great. But when my mom, mother-in-law and I arrived at Costco last Tuesday night, I knew I was going to be screwed. It started innocently enough, with a shrimp tray. The whole fiasco lasted for over 2 hours and finally concluded with adding four pounds of unsalted butter to the cart.

Wednesday was a nightmare because I lunched with one of my favorite people in the world – my best friend who lives in Dallas – had arrived to spend the holiday with his family. Despite the fact that he is in awesome shape, insisted (okay, actually, he agreed with me) that we indulge in Italian food. And, because we’re food whores, Italian dessert. Whatever, chocolate mousse is just flavored air anyway.

I returned home Wednesday afternoon to take a nap to recover from my fattening Italian feast and was pleasantly awoken in the early evening by Mr. Beauty Queen who informed me that his mom had made cream puffs and no-bakes! I dodged out of bed and sprinted downstairs (which burned at least 5 calories, right?!) to partake in the treats. It was divine.

Thursday was the big feast, and I think that I got exercising preparing the flipping thing. While my mom and my husband’s mom helped, we cooked for hours and hours and prepared everything from the turkey and a ham (since Mr. Beauty Queen HATES turkey on Thanksgiving) to stuffing and green bean casserole (along with like 300 other side dishes) and several pies. I topped the whole thing off with about – umm, I estimate 7 glasses (maybe?) of champagne. It was fun.

As hellish as the Thanksgiving ordeal was, I did stick to only one plate… which was exciting. And a first for any holiday. But I really was exhausted after spending all that time preparing dinner, and my table which was SO gorgeous!

The next day I took the moms out for English tea which consisted of several pots of tea as well as a cornucopia of savories, breads and treats. Of course I forgot my Splenda, so I, unfortunately, had to use ACTUAL sugar to sweeten the 30 cups of tea I had. I practically had to be rolled out of the tea room. It was not fun.

Anyway, the last few days have been spent eating the leftovers. I am finally getting rid of everything this weekend so that I can make room for healthy foods again in the fridge.

I originally was not going to weigh myself this week, but I did and I didn’t gain as much weight as I thought I did, which is great, but I’ve gained about a pound and a half. I’m still better than when I started this process, so I really need to stop beating myself up.

You’ll be glad to know that my family didn’t react at all to my weight – I was so thrilled with that. And as far as the pageant I judged this past weekend, it went great. I really enjoyed myself. In addition to learning to watch what I am putting in my body, I’m trying to learn to be more kind to it with my thoughts. I don’t want to be accommodating of obesity or an unhealthy lifestyle at all, but I do want to learn to be confident in any situation and remember more often to give myself credit for just trying to be the best I can be.

Anyway, as I mentioned before, I am working with April Showers Blog Design for my Christmas cards and I am hoping to be working with her soon to fix the design here within the next few weeks. My goal is to have my little corner of the world be a little more visual appealing. So anyway, in case you’re needing graphic design help as well, you’ll be happy to know that April Showers Blog Design is having a HUGE giveaway and celebrating her OPEN waiting list that starts January 1st! April not only does blogs – but also invitations, announcements, calendars, cards, business cards, custom illustrations and so much more! Just by pasting this paragraph on my blog I’m a winner!

Anyway, check her out at www.aprilshowersblogdesign.com.

So for now I’m off to get rid of these “leftovers” on my thighs. How I’ve missed Debbie! Okay, I’m a liar. But time to burn!




P.S. I really do want world peace.